On Solitude

From time to time there is a strong calling from within to leave the world of others and immerse into the world of self. It is a calling of special separation, a retreat one could say, so that the self stays for a moment alone. 

This moment of solitude can last from 10 minutes to 10 days or 10 months. Solitude is not to be confused with loneliness. It certainly does not embed a feeling of being left alone, excluded, ignored or abandoned. Solitude is also not to be confused with a rejection of the company of other humans, the friends or the beloveds. Instead it is a choice to stay primarily in the company of the self.

As the murmur of the crowd quiets, the chaos of thoughts settles down too. Stillness takes over, and clarity rises, just like when the fog dissolves in the air. In these moments of solitude, we be-friend ourselves and craft our self-awareness. We dedicate our time solely to our existence.  Occasionally, we reach out to our deepest wounds, wishes and fears, listen carefully to our soul and honor our story. In these moments we also be-friend the place we are in. We listen to her own deepest wounds, wishes and fears, sharing the unspoken grief and hope. One would be surprised to witness how many things a human has in common with the land, or to witness the richness and intensity of this kind of silent conversation.

This time, the call to solitude came to me unexpectedly. It was an internal urge to stay far from the fuss of social media, the busy internet world, the unnecessary conversations. I instinctively chose to focus on the important, the very valuable and precious. To my surprise, I lingered in this space of “solitude” for a month! It has been a serene, deep, sacred moment of reconnection with myself and the nature. Coming back to the world now, I return with a soft heart, a clear vision and an open spirit.

Eleni Michail

Fossils And The Message They Deliver

I am guessing that I walked by or stepped on hundreds of fossils in my life so far, but I was never aware of them. Of course I could easily recognize fossils I could pick up in my hands, like prehistoric shells, but not the ones imprinted on rocks. Perhaps I thought that their shapes were rock formations or something like this. For paleontologists though, these fossils are vital elements for tracking the evolution on Earth. When it come to
me, only recently I got to know how to recognize petrified fossils and my encounter with them was accompanied with a handful of questions, feelings and thoughts.

First came the excitement, the pure joy of the child who is finding something new and is staring at it, touching at it, smelling it for minutes.

Then came the curiosity: “How are fossils created? What was this particular fossil? How many years ago was this being alive?”

Next was the passion, and furiously I started looking around to find more fossils. One was not enough, two were not enough, three were not enough. I wanted more, I wanted to absorb as many as possible, as fast as
possible.

Unexpectedly, the scenery changed completely and the questioning accidentally deeper. “Will myself become a fossil one day? Will another human being encounter me (just like I did with these fossils) and have
all these questions herself? Or will a scientist study me? Or perhaps no human will live on Earth by that time? Will I actually leave something behind me?”. Having all these questions I felt myself (just like these once these living fossils) dipping into the darkness, being covered with sand, mud, water and despair.

Wait a minute, I haven’t come across these fossils by chance today! All the previous times I encountered them I was not conscious about their existence, now I am. All the previous times I didn’t ask myself these “weird”
questions, now I do. All the previous times I was not that aware of my soul quests, now I am. That is evolution in a micro-scale, don’t you think?

So here I am, looking at these fossils with awe, looking at these fossils with gratitude, for they have delivered an important message to me. A message to me, from me. A message to be who I truly am, because this is
the best way to be. To offer my gifts to the world selflessly and with confidence. To surrender in the present moment knowing that someday (who knows when) I will become the circumstance for someone to receive a message from herself.

Thank you for reading all the way through. Do share your thoughts below <3

Eleni Michail

The Thread Of The Song

Many days of the year I wake up with a song in my head. Does it ever happen to you? It feels like all night long, in my sleep, I was listening repeatedly to this song, so the moment I wake up, it’s still there. Then, throughout the day, this song keeps playing in a mental record player. Depending on the circumstances the song comes out of my physical boundaries through the form of humming, wistling, singing or really loud singing. The same song can stick with me for weeks sometimes.

These are the happiest days of my life. Even when the song is about sadness, pain or grief or my heart is aching, these are still the happiest days of my life. I am not saying they are the most joyful days (there is a significant difference between joy and happiness for which I can write another moment if you wish) but
they are days in which I feel connected with my soul, my truth, my spirit. That song seems to represent the thread of my life. When I hold on to the thread I know how to navigate through the day, through the life, despite the obscurity and obstacles. I feel grounded. I am confident. I am mindful. I am clear.

On the other hand, days when the mental record player is switched off, are truly hard. I feel disoriented and confused. The thread of life is not any more in my hands and I struggle to find my way. These days are teaching me to be patient, trustful and hopeful that the thread will soon appear again in my hands. And it
does. Today morning, after some days of silence, my record player offered me the song “You raise me up”. For the first time I ready mindfully the lyrics and I am convinced they talk about our inner wisdom and out innate capacity to self-heal.

What song did you wake up with today?

Eleni Michail

Spring Flowers In The Winter

I gathered these little flowers (some from the fields and some from the garden) during the Spring of 2019. I dried them and stored them in a jar. This jar was hidden behind many other jars with other herbs in the
back of the cupboard. A friend of mine once asked me why I need to have so many herbs for tea. She was somehow implying that perhaps I should consider reducing them in order to make more space in the closet (it’s true the cupboard is pretty full!). Oh, but no! Each herb is unique. Each herb has its own medicinal
purpose and I (all of us actually) need all of them in different occasions. Whether they serve a physical, emotional, mental or spiritual healing, each herb has its purpose in my closet. Yes, sometimes I forget they are there. But that’s maybe because they are not needed at those particular moment.

When I found the jar with these flower again 2 days ago I was delighted! They were so bright and colourful and their gorgeous scent was still there. With closed eyes I inhaled deeply and immediately my mind brought
back these wonderful journey of gathering them with care, drying them with patience and storing them with hope that one day they will work as healing. Now it’s their moment. In the coldest days of the year, a tea with wild chamomile, Cyprus wild lavender and rose nurture the soul, bring warmth to the heart, fill with gratitude the mind.

Eleni Michail

Home

This is my home. This is my land. This is the place I was born, the place I belong to, the place I feel rooted in, the place I want to nest, the place I want to die. When I stand in front of this lake, time stops. I am absorbed by the vastness of the place, I am captivated by the sounds of the birds, I am moved by the sensations the sacred water offers. My heart is serene, my body is relaxed, my mind is still, my spirit is open.

For many years I ignored this connection with the land. I thought passionately that Cyprus is not for me. I took every possible opportunity to escape, to run away, to fly towards other places and search for “my place”. Oh but boy, isn’t life a mystery? To walk a thousand kilometres only to return back to the same place? Yet, the return back to the same place is not a failure, but a victory. It is a repatriation not to only the land, but to yourself, to your core, to your essence.

Feeling indigenous to the land, as well as feeling indigenous to our own body, feelings and mind is one of our dimensions as human beings which is perhaps pushed away nowadays. I would say it is one of our basic needs. Without this connection we feel incomplete and in an endless search to find them, mostly in other places or other people or material things. I need to tell you though that the place we are all looking for is there and it’s mostly inside. It’s waiting patiently for us to lift our eyes and see it. We will know when we find it by experiencing the feeling of deep connection, rootedness, tranquillity and serenity.

Eleni Michail